3 Humanoids

Sick of boring old orcs, elves, dwarves, humans, halflings, gnomes, tieflings, svirfneblin, duergar, drow, aasimar, warforged, merfolk, golems, and all the other ones? Here are three EVEN MORE boring enemy/PC* races! 

*The Travelling Mailsman blog is not responsible for damages sustained from letting players play any or all of these races. 

VITALOIDS

HD: As Human   AC: Unarmored

Description

A humanoid creature, roughly 5 feet tall. Its entire torso is a heart containing the rest of the thoracic organs, with veins and arteries for arms and legs. Its head, correspondingly, is a large brain with a brain stem for a neck. It has no visible sense organs, but can hear and taste extremely well. It communicates by a sort of very short range telepathy: It can telepathically communicate if your brains are touching. They typically settle in tribes of 10-20. 

Disposition

They are generally very peaceful creatures, and want to learn as much from you as they can. They politely gesture if they can insert a harmless probe into your head so your brains can contact and you can talk. They don't have language powers, but speak nearly every language anyway (telepathy makes language learning much easier). 

Danger

In combat, they have use a limited psionic ability. They can lift roughly 5 pounds within a 10 foot radius, or featherweight objects within 30 feet. They can kill themselves to perform a blast of psionic energy dealing 1d6 damage. As they are a brain attached to a heart with giant blood vessels for limbs, all attack which hit them are critical hits. 

JUICERS

HD: 3   AC: Leather  STR/ATK: As Orc (or similar)

Description

Large, bulky, muscular humans and humanoids. Their skin is strange colors, ranging from muddy orange to fully gray, with huge chemical and cutting scars. On their backs are tanks full of bubbling yellow fluid with steel tubes feeding it into the backs of their necks. When they turn a winch on the tank, they instantly become as strong as the system allows, and gain the effects of a barbarian rage. They typically come in gangs of 3-10. 

Disposition

Loud, and angry, and violent. They are angry thugs who want to fight and kill everyone they meet. This is both the cause and effect of the juice tanks. They will negotiate, as they value both money and new juicers. Their long term goal is to overthrow the nearest government, remake it in the image of themselves, and then leave them to wither. They call this process "juicing". 

Danger

They are incredibly ready to fight, springing into deadly action at the first sign of betrayal, insult, or weakness. In combat, they have almost inexhaustible morale and brutality, but fight with very little tactics or communication. In general, their plan of action is "pick someone you don't like and let them know it". If you subdue them without killing them, they respect your superior strength. Juicers who respect you will help you if it doesn't majorly inconvenience themselves, and will tell their friends that you're too cool to attack. 

BANTAMITES
HD: 0   AC: Just kill them and they die. 

Description

Human-like creatures almost too small to see with the naked eye. Each is roughly as tall as an ant, but only as wide as a proportionate human. They act, look, and speak like ordinary humans. If placed inside of a player's earlobe, they can speak to them. All of them speak Common or Gospeltongue or whatever. Picking one up without killing it takes tweezers, magic, or a Dexterity check. Typically form civilizations of 1000-5000 in single dungeon rooms or hallways. 

Disposition

To a Bantamite, humans are Cthulhu. They are absolutely terrified of humans, but also find them fascinating. to a human, an economy-destroying mountain of gold is pocket change. To a human, quashing an entire enemy civilization takes a tap dance. They will form a religion around you if you aren't careful, but can be extremely useful spies and researchers if you are. Other than that which is based on their size, they act like typical humans. 

Danger

They can, with the work of several years, make a bomb or arrow launching device that might hurt you. With at least a dozen wizards, they can cast a fire spell that will deal 1 point of damage, or maybe summon some kind of small animal like a rat or badger. With multiple nations of wizards uniting, they might just pull off a Firebolt, but in that time you can just cover them all in oil and set them on fire.